Dead Land Journal June 17th 2027

I must be the absolute worst parent ever.

I have been driving around town with Dee for days and no child safety seat, and now because of my negligence she has a broken arm.

I have set the bone to the best of my ability and have a splint on it. God, I have to find other people out there. What happens if she really gets sick or something worse happens.

She screamed the whole time, and I had to lock Emily up in the garage until I was done. Fortunately it was a clean break and I could easily feel the bone pop into place when I pulled her arm out straight. Her upper arm is just a massive bruise now and there are bruises on her lower arm from me setting the bone. I thought about putting a cast on it, but decided monitoring the arm for signs of infection would be more important.

I guess I just thought that since there were no cops around and I'm a careful driver, what can happen, right? Well Dee was sitting in the passenger seat of the little Smart, standing actually, when a deer bolted out in front of the car. I slammed on the brakes fast enough to avoid hitting the deer, but she was thrown into the dash. I'm lucky that all she broke was her arm.

Dee is asleep now, Emily curled up protectively by her. She growls every time I approach. I hope she calms down enough so I can check Dee's arm again soon.

There is not one single painkiller out there that does not have a warning about giving to children. I most have looked at everything in drugstore twice over. I thought about looking in the pharmacy, but I did not even know what too look for. Finally I just gave her a shot of whiskey. I know I'm a horrible parent right? I think we already determined that. But that is what my grandmother gave me whenever I was sick or hurt. My mother used to scold her for it. I think she was afraid of Gramma turning me into an alcoholic, but Gramma would just say "It was good enough for you!" and that would be that. Anyway it worked. She has been asleep ever since. I need to find one of those Physician's Desk References like my mother had. She just called it her "Pill Book" But I should be able to find something better to give her in there and proper dosage.

I found a car seat next door and I will use it from now on. I have a feeling Dee won't like it, but I will have to be firm about it. And kids are not supposed to ride in the front seat either so I will be going down Noland Road tomorrow. There is about a mile long strip down Noland that is almost nothing but car lots. I think I will get a four door Jeep. The Smart really is not practical anymore.

It's about supper time now, but I think I will let Dee sleep and give her a sandwich or something when she wakes up. Oh crap I forgot, no bread. Used the last of the bread up yesterday. All the bread that was left in the stores is either moldy or carried off by rats. Maybe some peanut butter on some saltines. I will think of something.

© 2009 R. Keith McBride